UK Games Expo 2013
24th May to 26th May

If anyone is interested I’m going to be attending UK Games Expo, I’m running 5 games over a busy weekend, which I suspect may involve some drinking too.

I’ll be running…

I’ve written the C&D and AP scenarios myself and have yet to see the Cthulhu scenario, I’m sure it’ll be fine, but I do like to prep and estimate running times so getting hold of this will be crucial.

At the moment I’m trying to put the 2 scenarios I’ve written into some semblance of coherence for other people to use, I may just take them with me to Condamned too so that I can contribute to that convention too.

Ah well, wonder if I’ll get time to playtest these prior to the convention, which by the way is in 7 weeks time, yikes I’d better warm up the printer.

Originally posted over at ExSanguinated

Glenn.

To placate the Orcs I use my vast reserves of knowledge to create a culinary masterpiece in Eel and Hellfire (just one bite, a delightful taste that tantalises the taste buds and ensnares the Soul; before they knew it my cooking had damned them to eternal service to the Lords Below).  But an interesting discovery has been unearthed by my bumbling pawns, upon further exploration the underwater tunnel into which they had been dragged has been found to open into a natural cavern.  Ever the intrepid explorers (and to escape the tedium of the Orcs Company [who make even my current associates interesting by comparison]) we sunk into the stinking depths to explore.

Hi ho, hi ho, it’s off to the underdark we go.  We have discovered evidence of working within the caves of the underdark.  Descending further we discover the work of Duergar, ancient tunnels worked with great skill.  Could we find badly needed allies here?

Our first obstacle is a blocked tunnel; my strong but mentally challenged pawns are “persuaded” by my magnetic personality to clear the tunnel but even when I graciously grant them my expertise and unparalleled intellect (no, pick up THAT rock not the one beneath it, pull from the top and you won’t get buried this time) it takes us many hours to clear a path.

Breaking through we beheld a cavern and tunnels bedecked with Duergar reliefs and religious symbols, free from defacement or decay.  But our joy was short lived; we found a strange 3 arms, 3 legged creature with a mighty mouth atop its body, it said something like “oh, not dwarfs, ok I can eat you” (from what must have an old folklore tale Sith called it a Xorn).  It fell before out power with almost contemptuous ease; but it was a bad sign of things to come.  Dwarves, not Duergar it said.  For we found dwarves, Axe men who held little threat but their crossbow welding guard must have inscribed their bolts with holy power for they ripped through my infernal essence and I fell into Fire and Darkness; I heard the voices of the Lords of Accounts, calling forth the Balance of Payments, heard the beginning of the Final Accounting, and every second was like a lifeage of pain; But I felt life in me again, Xorox splashed enough healing potion randomly around me to being me back.  After the battle we retreated, recovered and pressed on.  Again we faced more guards, Sith fell but Xorox seemed possessed by fell spirits and scythed his way through them.  It appears the Lord of Lords Below favours him tonight.

Sith’s Log

Upon dragging ourselves out of the rancid waters of the goblin cave, Skara decided to cook the eels we caught for the orcs. They seemed to like them ruined, good; it buys us more time to gather strength before the coming storm.

Xorax wanted to find the last eel that bested him; i understand his want to regain his honour but sifting through shit isn’t my idea of valour. After securing him to a rope he found an opening into fresh air.

Deciding to investigate we slipped our orcish ‘friends’ and swam for it. Skaras infernal flames came in useful for once, not that he doesn’t try but his ambition far outweighs his mastery of the dark arts. He lit the way as we explored, after what seemed like an age we found what appeared to be worked stone. Skara identified the carvings as the work of Duergar, They explained they were short soft skinned creatures, who descended into the darkness of the earth long ago and are shunned by most. We felt they may be worthy allies as they would be stronger than the goblins. More progression into the depths turned from well worked engravings the like of which i had never seen, to just smoothed. The working of the rock looks like it takes great skill, nothing like would have been seen in my tribe.

We came across a collapsed passage and decided to dig. Turning back empty handed would have seemed suspicious at least to the orcs. After hours of shifting rubble we broke into another engraved room of Duergar work, confident we were on track we pushed on cautiously as we didn’t know how they would react.

Something stirred in the dark and called to us, we knew not what it was but moved up to greet it as friend or foe. A horror of the caverns, a Xorn rushed as soon as it saw us weren’t dwarves! A whirling dervish of stone it lashed out at all of us at once, we chipped at its craggy exterior and when it seemed beat, it lunged at me with its gaping maw. Never have I felt so much like a minnow dashing from a pike, fortunately it was its dying act. We took some time to recuperate and pressed on into the tunnel it appeared to be guarding.

Quickly we were set upon by 3 stout Dwarves, a brief fight ensued, Xorax showed us his worth and slew one in two mighty blows, but the weakling Skara was laid low before he could inflict many wounds. Xorax fed a magic potion into the infernal fires of Skara and somehow it revived him as we slew the remaining two.

We beat a hasty retreat taking two corpses with us in case they raised the alarm. After catching our breath and healing our wounds we decided to delve deeper into the dwarven mine. This time we came across 4 dwarves! I decided to protect the weakling and threw myself at 3 of the stout ones, after nearly killing two I succumbed just in time for Skara and Xorax to kill the other one I ignored and finish of the other three.

Unsure of our strength and wounds we decided to leave this dangerous place.

Xorox’s Log

Dire Diary,

Well I persuaded the orcs to lend us some soldiery, along with their psychopathic Orog lieutenant who for some reason now expects to gain an empire. I suppose that expectation arose because I said he would. Unfortunately his potential first subjects, the goblins we are staying with, hopped it to a far corner of the map, thus upsetting my finely wrought machinations (certain people of a reptilian or armour-clad flamey bent may believe that I was just machinating as I went along).

I was able to persuade the orcs that the entire goblin tribe were out scouting and then thought to distract them with a wonderful meal. All the food had gone with the goblins so I turned my attention to the eels in the underground pool. After striking the water with my axe a few times in hope rather than angling expertise, we were beset by giant eels that sought to drag us down to a watery doom. But rather than the doomers they became the doomees. And also lunch.

I noticed that the eels had come from an underwater tunnel and wondered whether it led somewhere. I did some exploring and discovered it was so: an air-filled somewhere. So Sith, Skara and I plunged into the deeps and came out in a mysterious complex which may have belonged to the Duergar, the dark dwarves! After further exploration we encountered some non-dark dwarves that we felt we really ought to engage in combat. It was then that my dread smiting really came into its own as I smote most dreadfully and those who were the targets of smiteage soon wished they weren’t. By Asmodeus, I look forward to more smits… smoots… sma… hitting of people soon!

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In dire peril we split up, travelling as far as the Dwarven stronghold to see if they are acting.  The Goblins and hobgoblin return to their lair to prepare defences, I sally forth to Request aid from Sallamaf the Wraith and Sith and Xorox go to the Orcs to get troops.

Sallamaf could give no aid; he is afraid of the paladin of Tyr and refuses to send any minions to aid us.  He has given the Goblins sanctuary in his graveyard; were the tribe would become food for his Ghouls and additional minions for his undead army.  I am not so foolish to trust the word of a follower of the Price of Lies, so I return empty handed but with a cunning plan to lure the adventurers to his graveyard.  But in this I am thwarted, the cowards are fleeing to the forest north of the graveyard; even a blind Halfling could trail that lot.  So I sit and wait for my companions in death.

Sith and Xorox return with the orc/orge thing and some warriors; they immediately demand “Grog” and Goblins (I play dumb pretending to not understand them).  It appears that my foolish fellows have given away the goblins freedom to recruit these warriors.  In many ways it is good the goblins fled as this would have come to blows with us in the middle.  Now in order to appease these greenskins (who are demanding Eels) Xorox practically threw himself into the water and the waiting coils of one Eel, forcing me to unleash my full power to save his life, only to have 2 more assault him and Sith.  After a brutal battle Xorox once again owes his life to the infernal energies I pushed into him to keep him alive.

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It has begun, the implosion of Evil and the loss to Good that underlies every failure, a systemic cancer that destroys all we build.  To paraphrase an ancient religious tract beloved of the forces of Light, “Evil will fall because Evil will always turn in upon itself”.  Today we suffered an attack by the ranger ally of the half elf we killed by the lake.  Accompanied by her bear familiar and bound water elemental she ravages the upper guards until we responded to the call, battling her to a standstill and banishing the water elemental back whence it came, but Xorox and Sith fell.  She fled rather than face me, but I could not pursue and destroy her as the bugbears threatened by pawns, I could not allow them to die yet; so their own traitorous nature allowed a powerful champion to flee.  After rousing the pawns we gave chase, guided by the tribe’s tracker.  We hounded her footsteps until we came the village… we were too late!  She had already made contact with the adventurers!!

Now combined we saw them gather, and cross the river, making preparations to assault the Cave.  They are too strong for us to fight alone; the tribe will fall unless we can gather allies or concoct a plan to trap and destroy them.

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Played every other Thursday at Emma’s house

GM: Pete O

Players: Emma, James B, Dan H, Pete C

Setting: Forgotten Realms 600 years after 1^st Ed continuity (No time of troubles or later).

A few hundred years ago two adventuring priests, one of Gond (God of Technology) and one of Mystra (Goddess of magic), traditionally in opposition over which is better, tech or magic, found that by using magic and Tech together they greatly enhanced both aspects of a device, this revelation fuelled a renaissance.  Mystra and Gond themselves began to work together, pulling the other gods into the new spirit of cooperation.

Now magical devices are common place in the world, and most countries and races live in relative harmony.  The once feared Red Wizards of Thay are now a powerful merchant nation providing low cost techno-magic contrivances to all nations, but every nation has their own magical artifice.

Thanks to larger and larger magic carpets, flying broom, cauldron airways and (for the rich) portals people are well travelled, less likely to war and in need of entertainment, partially mitigated by Magicasts, magical broadcast that could be received by any scrying device (in fact many home of the well to do had their own scrying device, or they could head down and see it on the big mirror in their local tavern).  Adventures now find it harder and harder to venture into unknown parts, fight monsters and raid tombs as they keep facing legal action for trespass, murder and burglary.  This issue came to a head when lawyers from the Nine Hells started a class action suit on behalf of the goblinoid races, the differently vital and associated monsters and abominations.  After this issue was presided over by Judge 9271 of Mechanicus adventurers where given amnesty for their crimes if they agreed to leave these poor individuals and families alone, now if an adventurer kills an Orc its MURDER.  Now the realms had a problem, lots of murderous hobos with nowhere to hobo too.

Into this breach stepped the wizard formally known as the mad mage of undermountain (he got better), Halaster Blackcloak.  Over several thousand years he had shaped undermountain into the greatest dungeon in the realms, now in a joint deal with Realms Wide Magicaster, he has turned undermountain into the latest and greatest magicast, Million Dollar Dungeon; where adventurers compete for prizes.

Many monster signed up, emboldened by high wages, interesting living conditions, the opportunity to safely hack annoying adventures apart and, if popular enough with the public, free resurrections (no-one like to see their favourite villain die only once).  Once the show kicked off rating went through the roof and everyone wanted to be in on it.  Many copied the idea, on a smaller scale, but Million Dollar Dungeon had undermountain, a back drop no-one could beat.

Now it is sponsored by Churches and corporations alike, with many evil gods having temples to be raided.  The High Imperceptor of Bane (God of Tyranny) has been personally killed no less than 17 Times in a variety of specials, the rating for those where astronomical and he got a special commendation from Bane (During one of his trips to the afterlife) for bring the word of Bane to so many and for providing much need revenue to run the Banite “brain-right” day care centre.

Contestant Rules

Equipment restrictions

No extra dimensional items or pocket dimensional magics are allowed (so no Bags of Holding or Handy haversacks) due to the use of extra dimensional magics within Undermountain.

Consumables:

All items must be useable by the individual carrying the item.

Each person is allowed no more than 10 Potions/Scrolls.

No More than 3 Wands.

No more than one Rod.

No More than One magic Staff of any variety.

Magical Items

All magical items must be useable and equipped by the individual at the start of the program, holding other magical items in reserve is strictly forbidden.

Weapons

You are allowed:

Up to 2 Weapon and Shield/empty hand combinations.

Up to 1 2Hed Weapon.

Up to 1 set of Matched Weapons for dual wielding.

Up to 1 Projectile Missile Weapon with no more than 3 sets of Quivers (60 Shots in all).

Up to 10 Throwing Weapons.

Dungeon Conduct

You are allowed to kill, main, torture, eviscerate and otherwise dispatch your opposition in any way you see fit except for the following restrictions:

No attacks that result in an opponent being rendered into an unrecoverable state.

If you steal any souls they must be returned to Dungeon officials at the end of the program.

Said clauses also apply to opponents within the Dungeon.

Loot

Your loot will consist of Million Dollar Dungeon Prize vouchers, redeemable after the program has ended.  Any plunder/equipment/Rods of Ultimate Power must be handed back after the program has ended.

You are free to use any such plundered equipment during the show but any unnecessary waste or destruction of said property will result in a fine and a charge to replace the equipment.

Example:  Using a potion of fire resistance you recovered from a corpse to protect yourself in the flaming room is fine, using it for no justifiable reason on the other hand will incur a fine.

The Fine will be 120% of the value of the object.

The Producers reserve the right to inflict pain, suffering, humiliation and death if ratings begin to fall.  These can be delivered by many various and underhand ways.

Upon our return to the Snotty Nosed Goblins, with our spoils of War, we were greeted with terrible news; Arg is dead, eaten by the Eels living near the latrine.  Upon investigation an Eel dared to attack me, but against a master of shade and fire it stood no chance as I stepped through fire and death out of its reach.  I sense foul play; the bugbears are behind this, with their little collection of bullied Goblins.  But we arrived in time for the feast, the goblins cooked up the half-elf we recovered and held a celebration to their god.

I decided enough was enough; we needed to strike against the humans.  We travelled to the logging station east of the Orc tribe and struck a mighty blow upon them; or that was the plan.  I glided like a wraith through the night, but Xorox blundered like a man with his eyes ripped out and his feet burnt off, alerting the guard to our presence (so plan A, burn down the lumber hut and observe their response was out).  Instead we lured them into an ambush; a battle that went well with little lose to us.  Their guards are well trained and strong (for humans) so a direct assault on their compound will not work, at least until we have weaken them a bit more.  But we had a few corpses and their equipment as spoils; both of which were gratefully received by the Snotty Nosed Goblins.

Xorox’s Diary

Dire Diary,

Yesterday my colleagues and I made some gains in the evil stakes. We began with a feast of roasted nymph (sourced by our own unfair hands) that we had given to the chief of the local nose-based goblin tribe. Things took a turn for the worse when it appeared that the Armour Chap’s goblin factotum (aptly named Arg) had gone missing and possibly been eel-ed to death. I think we all suspect some treachery from the bugbears. Note to self: the bugbears must be destroyed.

I joined the Armour Chap and the Lizardy Fellow on a sojourn to the humans’ logging camp to the south. Upon approaching the camp I pretended to trip clumsily, causing my own armour to make a suspicious noise. Of course this was but a subterfuge and we used this incident lure out several of the humans and their monstrous hound. During the ensuing melee I slew the hound and aided in mopping up the rest of the loggers. We left when the battle attracted the attention of the rest of the humans and hopped it back to the goblin camp with our ill gotten human meat. This pleased the chief so much he let us off the guard duty we pretend to do.

Blood and souls to Asmodeus,

Xorax

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This tribe is pitiful, we are “living” with the goblins, the weakest, lowest of the tribe.  They are a sorry state, Snotti has been making friends with his generosity (a smart move, the goblins will accept one of their own more readily than the rest of us, with a will to follow based on something more than physical treat).  One of the Goblins, Arg, lost his food to the rest, so I stepped in and ensured he got his share.  We need to work together and to break down the culture of bullying and mistreatment to the weak.  Arg seems to like me now, odd creature but he may serve in an experiment; I will need to think on this.

The Bugbears have acted, as expected seeing as we bluffed our way in by replacing them.  They attacked whilst the other slept (I was lost in my revel of pain and loss; is it really better in this world, suffering completed me down there for I deserved it, here there is a void there must be some way to fill it).  One jumped on Snotti but his wolf leapt to his defence, the other attacked Ssith who threw him aside and rose like a storm.  I would have said this fight was uneven and acted, but the Lords Below obviously felt now was not the time, for my powers flew wild (I felt their hand in this, a reminder that I do not have my freedom, just the illusion, a revelation that felt like red hot dagger in my gut…it felt soooo good), until Snotti came close to falling.  I have recently found a way to isolate some of my Flame, my infernal essence, and share it with others; Snotti was the first of my companions to feel the joy of Infernal Fire, repairing his body (at the cost of a small debt applied to his soul, I won’t burden him with such knowledge yet) and keeping him awake.  Ssith fought well but he was eventually overmatched, but not before the other bugbear fell before the power of my Fire.  Now the wounded Bugbear and I battled, Scythe and Morningstar clashing in a shower of sparks, distracted by Snotti’s wolf he never saw my blade strike, felling him.  Luckily for both I was not aiming to kill, they will have their uses in the days ahead.

After the battle we became heroes to the goblins, who jumped on their bugbear oppressors with great glee as we left the cavern to go to our new quarters, the bugbears old hut.  Arg has taken a shine to me, I have decided to see if a mere goblin, the weakest of his clan, can be raised into something better.

Another clash with the bugbears this morning; they need to be put in their place and reminded they have lost their “lofty” position and to not abuse the goblins.  They are not happy but they will learn or suffer.  We have an audience with the Chief tomorrow, before that we must formula a plan.  The Tribes hunter told us what he knows of the local land, not much but the dwarven mine is an attractive target.  We will need to find some way through to them; their front is heavily guarded and fortified (there is an abandoned mine further down in the hills, I wonder if any tunnels in that mine link up with the dwarves, or if they are close enough to tunnel through?).  For now we have decided to investigate the Dam, some creature dwells there, as does a humanoid of some sort, be they ally or enemy we do not yet know.

The Rise of the Snot Nosed Goblins is at hand!

Snotty’s log

muah’ gets goblin hole, big deep. big goblin angry
down is boss, and bones. muah’ hungry, find nham nham.
goblin hole little nham nham, bad. go snore.
wake big goblin beat muah’! dog bites big goblin, leaves muah’ alone.
big snake man fall, wolf and scary metal beat big goblin.
now muah’ big nham nham, good.

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We have put forward our plan to begin exploring the area and received the Chief’s blessing, but he denied our request to bring Arg along, pity for he needs battle experience.  A straggler from the Red hand has arrived, Xorax the Hobgoblin (but there is a mutable feel about him) and joined with us.  Our rest was disturbed by Goblins arguing over the chiefs preferred fare, Dwarf or Eel, a minor point that we might use to curry favour with him.

After a delightful walk through the barren hills we entered what can only be described as a most horrific landscape, Tree, flowers, birds singing..awful.  Upon our entry to this…Forest… we were accosted by a plant thing that told Xorax and I to leave, but invited in Sith (no accounting for taste); unfortunately he cannot speak the bottom dweller common tongue, or the pansy accursed language of the elves (it makes me sick to utter anything other than curses in elvish) and it refused to allow me to enter as his translator; so he ventured forth alone.  The truth account of his meeting may never be known (I may hunt down the strumpets soul one day and “inquire” about it) but Sith returned freshly fed and watered with tales of a nature creature, a druid he said (With a barely concealed rage, I think he holds an unjust grudge against Druids just because they wiped out his family..I mean everyone’s committed genocide at some point in their lives haven’t they.  I still hold that Orphanage attacked me first) with a friend wandering the area, a nomadic ranger with a bound spirit in the lake (which we would later learn is a water elemental), A target for another day.

So we made our preparations and struck forth to destroy this blight upon all that is twisted and foul.  We quickly ran afoul of the plant creature again, and we almost talked our way past it with a brilliant deception spun by myself, but the Lizardman Dance of Thanks (the only thing Sith had to do to valid my entire cunning ruse) was a pathetic jump-jump-twist-lunge affair instead of jump-jump-twist-pirouette-splits-brisé-demi detourné-jazzhands and we couldn’t persuade it to allow us though to perform for the Druid, so we killed it instead.  Unfortunately it keened loudly, alerting the druidess, and it had the most irritating ability to entrap our legs, effectively putting Sith out of the fight as he just stood there (we need to get him a large pointy pole or something) but it misjudged the Awesome Power at my command.  It foolishly closed with me, thinking to avoid my hellfire by being closer. HA HA HA HAAA, for I can channel my hellfire through my scythe, as soon as it saw that it trembled in fear and fell before my power, and what passed for a soul tasted like basil, very odd but even the infernal Powers like the odd bit of topiary.

Now the preliminaries where out of the way onto the main course; we found her by her hut on guard and warning us off, as if we would allow this blight on the world to endure.  She called another plant creature and bushes to her aid.  Once more Sith was neutered most of the fight, and Xorax spent most of his time pruning bushes but the plant creature fell before him (after being weakened by the Hellborn Powers of the greatest evil around (this small forest area)..me) and without the infernal infusions at my command Sith would have fallen (not that he realised each time he taste of my essence he pulls himself closer to hell, for I can be subtle as well).  With Sith and Xorax finally free of their bonds (and the odd perfumes this Druid keep chucking around that seemed to dope them) we combined our power against the Druid and she fell, but not before running to the lake and raising help in the form of a water elemental (the powerful spirit ally from before).  A creature of good has fallen, a guardian of nature is gone; our first strike to weaken good in this land has been struck with no loses to us, a mighty Victory indeed (plus there appears to be Eels in the lake, so a fishing expedition beckons).

Siths Log

We attended the guard duties given to us by the small ones only to keep their peace. This place reeks of dank decay, the sooner we get out into the wilds again the better, and too that end Skara has obtained an audience with our so called leaders. On the morning of the 8th day of our mission to this forgotten place another companion was sent, Xorax a hobgoblin of fearsome appearance, much more promising than the whelps we have been traveling with.

Skara managed to convince the snotty nosed goblins to let us out and start exploring to see if we can get some decent food for ourselves. He seems focused on helping the weaker race, I’m not convinced these goblins will live up to his expectations.

We set out with little aid of our new masters; they expect everything and give nothing. They are not worthy of our allegiance, but if we are to raise our standing in the Red Hand we must aid them.

We struck out for the lake to the North West, We decided that anything else in the region would mean certain death for us.

We reached a rich grove that was much plusher than any of the surrounding lands and when some kind of Vine Creature emerged from the bushes my suspicions were confirmed, here dwelt the forces of nature: druids. My blood boiled at the sight of this creature but I calmed my pick, the ease this creature hid made me think there could be many more close by. For some reason it thought I was a friend, my southern cousins must be soft indeed. With Skara’s help I asked for supplication, and travelled with this abomination to its master. Her features were typical of soft skinned races and it took all my will and cunning not to reveal my hand. I could feel power emanating from her and learned all I could about her allies but we did not share a common tongue.

After feeding I reconvened with my allies and relayed what I had learnt. Thankfully they saw the need to eliminate this stain on the land. Knowing she had allies and no way too know where they were we devised a plan to draw them out, playing on their previous good will. The Vine beast saw through our plan and we had to make a quick decision, Attack or leave? There was only one option, the gods called for blood and souls. These creatures used many tricks to hold us in place and weave their magic from afar. The scales on my feet are cracked from the vines clinging to my legs. After hacking our way through the druid’s plant-minions we chased her out into the water. A powerful water elemental appeared just as we managed to knock the bitch out. I blacked out as I reached the shore and my brethren pulled me to safety.

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